make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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