whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
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