p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
Randomize
