2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
21 Times Karma Showed These People Not to Mess Around
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.