I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank you for not boning my boss.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
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