Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Randomize