I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
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