yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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