Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.