yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
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