Texts From Last Night

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  (857): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm glad girls dont get visible erections

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  But, it would have made life so much easier...

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  (857): I'm glad girls dont get visible erections (617 ): But, it would have made life so much easier... http://tfl.nu/zuky
  Replies (27) Good night (3345) Bad night (496)
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  (320): View more from Minnesota

  Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks

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  (320): Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks http://tfl.nu/7398
  Replies (64) Good night (1299) Bad night (6300) Order T-Shirt
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom

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  (608): She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom http://tfl.nu/qu7d
  Replies (17) Good night (946) Bad night (3585) Order T-Shirt
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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside

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  (501): there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside http://tfl.nu/1bna
  Replies (85) Good night (6963) Bad night (730) Order T-Shirt
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.

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  (508): Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated. http://tfl.nu/vtpc
  Replies (40) Good night (1282) Bad night (3522) Order T-Shirt
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  (941): View more from Florida

  She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???

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  (941): She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina??? http://tfl.nu/hnyt
  Replies (24) Good night (1071) Bad night (7825) Order T-Shirt
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice

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  (240): He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice http://tfl.nu/qhk7
  Replies (3) Good night (2445) Bad night (755) Order T-Shirt
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  (206): View more from Washington

  Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.

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  (206): Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional. http://tfl.nu/t1vf
  Replies (9) Good night (2517) Bad night (447) Order T-Shirt
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  (530): View more from California

  Maybe I'm a robot.

  (831): View more from California

  You can't be that drunk already

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  (530): Maybe I'm a robot. (831): You can't be that drunk already http://tfl.nu/ekm7
  Replies (8) Good night (1981) Bad night (471)
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  (254): View more from Texas

  By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.

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  (254): By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook. http://tfl.nu/9v3n
  Replies (8) Good night (1868) Bad night (444) Order T-Shirt
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.

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  (303): Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night. http://tfl.nu/q0n9
  Replies (7) Good night (1025) Bad night (364) Order T-Shirt
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.

  (1-615): View more from Tennessee

  Who in tha hell do u hang out with?

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  (615): I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls. (1-615): Who in tha hell do u hang out with? http://tfl.nu/cxra
  Replies (5) Good night (1892) Bad night (456)
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  (661): View more from California

  He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.

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  (661): He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian. http://tfl.nu/6vas
  Replies (25) Good night (3253) Bad night (489) Order T-Shirt
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.

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  (202): She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top. http://tfl.nu/luup
  Replies (10) Good night (960) Bad night (323) Order T-Shirt
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo

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  (703): The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo http://tfl.nu/r2ud
  Replies (4) Good night (603) Bad night (234)

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