Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
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