he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize