Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
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