He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize