I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize