walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize