You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
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