K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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