i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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