just tell him i said nine months
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.