im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian