these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals