Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Randomize
