i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
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