there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico