Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
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