He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
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Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
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we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?