I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
Love having children with random chicks
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
31 Times Kim Kardashian Showed Her Love For Balmain
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
19 Tricks To Help You Join The Mile High Club
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....