Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
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