i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
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