Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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