This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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