I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize