come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
