Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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