remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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