Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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