how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
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you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
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I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
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