FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
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