P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Randomize
