i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
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