Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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