Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize
