Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize