ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
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