once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize