so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
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