we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize
