She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize