Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
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He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
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Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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