she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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